You ever have rodets in your house?

I got three of them..

Haha you got three kids.

I got a mouse or something.

Mothballs, mouse traps.

You got a cat? Get a cat.

My cat won't get them.

You can put poision out there and they'll die.

I would not call an exterminator though.

No that is a waste of money!

"Forgot my rubbers. Can't go home without my rubbers"

"I didn't get pneumonia..."

"Naw but you got your papers wet"

“My nose keeps running.”

“You need one of those nostril things.”

“A turkey baster would work.”

“He’s got one of those Bose Wave Radios and damn – does that thing light up the hollow! He’s got all dem plugs and CD’s and doo dads. I like silent myself, I like nature. I don’t want to hear none of that crap.”

“You keep a shrunken Clementine in your desk?”

“Well people kept asking me about it so I moved it, it’s a science project. This is about a 10-12 years old Orange. Kept it from my last job.”

“She asked why I was going to the Laundromat when I had a pond…”

I'm going to the liquor store to get some liquor

"It's like a big angry circus in here"

Oh boy here we go again! She’s had the swine flu, she’s out of work, she has no job…blala-blah-blah.

“Ya’ll seen my Pudder? My Pudder’s lookin good!”

"Just got back from dropping my car off for an oil change. Yeah 3000 miles past due. The mechanic said it only had ONE quart of oil in it. Very black."

ME: "If your car breaks down, you deserve it"